My Biggest Take Away From Year 1

I am officially done with my first year of college and have been for about three weeks now. It’s kind of crazy looking back at where I was exactly a year ago, I had no idea what lay before me and I don’t know if my freshman year was what I expected or if I even expected anything at all. An entire year out of four of my undergrad experience is under my belt but somehow I feel like I have nothing to show for it.

Since faces old and new have started trickling back into my daily life I’ve noticed so many changes both physically and mentally. Everyone and their mom seems to have a new piercing, tattoo, significant other, favorite genre of music and then some and I feel like I’m returning just how I left. I do have one new piercing but it’s small and not very noticeable. I change my hair often but I did that in high school too. I feel like I’ve lived a whole new life for an entire school year and have no proof it ever even happened except for a better sense of style maybe. It seems as if the same Khayli that left High School is the same girl that returned from her freshman year of college. But I don’t feel that way.

In fact I feel completely ostracized from that Khayli- well not completely but you understand my point. I couldn’t have been more lost, confused or cowardly than I was leaving high school- constantly seeking the approval of others without even realizing and living following the rules and regulations of those around me. During my first year of school I learned that I can do anything and I don’t mean the cliche " sky’s the limit” mentality I mean I can literally do anything I want and I do. I get good grades, I make good friends, I take interesting classes and have fun nights. I go for walks in the woods and strolls in the city, I made a website and love making conversation with people who were once total strangers!! I can do anything I want and no one can stop me unless I give them the power to.

That’s my biggest take away from my first year of college. That you and I can do literally anything we want. The mentality I had during school is hard to implement when I’m off campus and to be honest I have to constantly remind myself not to sacrifice my satisfaction for others but when I listen to that tiny reminder I feel so good! I spend my time the way I want to with the people I want to and leave experiences feeling full and enriched! I do as I please and if that separates me from the crowd or makes people uncomfortable - who cares? And no I may not have a piercing or tattoo to prove that I did in fact experience college, I do live life better now and that is just gonna have to cut it.